Relationships

The Effects of Alcohol Use on Relationships

When someone with an alcohol problem is on the exaggeration side of low frustration tolerance, then all the expression occurs – and this is different from that flat, calm, expressing little way of acting. Not being able to handle what one formerly did, having that “low frustration tolerance” type of day, can mean a lot of emotion is coming out. And family, friends, etc are confused and affected by this.

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

Recent research has shown that breaking up with a lover has many of the characteristics of withdrawal from drugs.   We already knew that romantic attachments and sexual activity stimulate the same parts of the brain as drugs and alcohol.  That “pleasure center” exists in order to reward us for doing things that are good for …

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The First Step Is No Theory — Unmanageability

“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol–that our lives had become unmanageable.” (The First Step of Alcoholics Anonymous, used by all 12-step programs in modified form.) We discussed powerlessness last week. We found that we are not powerless over alcohol and other drugs as long as we are not using them. We talked about the fact …

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Codependency: Interview With An Al-Anon Member

I was browsing the All Treatment site, and ran across this excellent interview with Syd, a scientist and recovering codependent.  It gives remarkable insight into what it’s like to grow up and live with active addiction in a family, and to how it can affect us emotionally, spiritually — even physically — without our picking up a drink …

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Reflections On Old Times And Old Friends

When you’re involved in recovery from drug addiction, alcoholism, codependency and related areas (especially when you spend a lot of time writing about them), you tend to see their effects in many places. I just came back from my 48th high school reunion in a small Central Florida town.  It was great!  I got reacquainted …

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Self-Image For Addicts

We need to remember that much of what we now know about addiction was not even dreamed of in the philosophy available to those who founded the 12-Step organizations. While obviously respecting the Steps, Traditions and the groups, Digital Dharma has posted this essay about considering ourselves and our addictions with a bit more clarity …

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Clean And Sober Holidays — How Do I Manage?

I plan on writing something about this for later in the week, but in the meantime Sobriety Girl has some good thoughts: Here’s a scenario. It’s your first few months sober and Thanksgiving, being your first holiday, suddenly creeps up on you. Panic. Angst. What do you do? Hide from the family? Ignore the holiday completely? …

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This One’s For The Kids Who Never Grew Up

Adult children of alcoholics and addicts don’t get as much attention in the treatment world as they deserve.  That’s not because they’re not important, but simply because the presenting member(s) of the family and any kids at home tend to be far more prominent.  When we can, we encourage adults who came from an alcoholic …

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